This week I was fortunate enough to have had the time to meet with one of my dearest friends in Israel, and on another occasion my step sister who I have not seen in what feels like forever. As is to be expected with us girls, our relationships were the foremost topics of conversations during both meetings. My girlfriend and her husband just celebrated their half a year wedding anniversary, Ida and her boyfriend have been living together for many moths now, and I just celebrated 2 years with Stephane, so it is really only natural that most of our stories revolved around our significant others.
After these meetings I thought quite a bit about the subject of relationships, and gave myself time to really think back over the last two years that I have spent with Stephane. I don’t often let my thoughts wander to my former roommates, but as I was thinking about the evolution of Stephane and myself as a couple, a particularly relevant story came to mind. The roommate I am referring to was someone who, I am convinced, did everything in his power to ensure that nothing serious ever developed between Stephane and me. Every step of the way he practically quivered with excitement to tell me how much Stephane was enjoying single life (with explicit details) and didn’t want a girlfriend, and he particularly lit up every time he could rub the fact that he had started a relationship of his own in my face. Despite the fact that I never put any value into ANYTHING this roommate said, I still couldn’t help but feel completely defeated when he brought up the situation between Stephane and me. One day, however, as he was blissfully ranting about how I was wasting my time with someone who would never become serious with me, something deep inside caused me to answer back in a very surprising way. I looked at him and said, “in 3 months (or less) you won’t even remember the name of the girl you are dating right now, but I promise you one day I will marry Stephane…” After only 5 short weeks his relationship was over, but I still had something with Stephane.
I had nothing to back up what I said to my roommate that day outside of a feeling that I had felt since almost the first moment I had started interacting with Stephane. I knew, deep down, that he was the one I was meant to be with, which is why, even when I wanted to, I never ended what we had (though at times I probably should have). There was so much uncertainty, many tears of frustration (at least on my end), but I knew there was a plan for us. I put my faith in God like I never have before, prayed harder than I can remember, and completely let go. I had met my soulmate at the worst possible time, but instead of giving up I decided to wait patiently for the right time to come. To be honest, the “right” time came a whole heck of a lot sooner than I had thought it would. The moment I took a step back and gave Stephane all of the freedom and space he could want and need to make his decision about us, the closer and closer he came to me, until one day we just… became…
From virtually nothing grew a relationship truly blessed and nurtured by God himself. The more time I spend with Stephane the more I realize that the unique things that make us who we are are like puzzle pieces that fit together to create this beautiful picture of pure happiness. We are polar opposites yet almost exactly the same. What he lacks I make up for, and what I am missing he has in abundance. We are adults but we act like children, and no matter what happens we never take life, or ourselves, too seriously. We play, we laugh, we bicker, we learn, we discover, we teach, we advise, but most importantly we always listen and hear one another. We don’t fight because we don’t want to. We are not perfect, nor are we kids anymore… We are both preparing to take some very big steps in our lives, and we have real, adult things to fight about (plus he has a Moroccan temper and likes to yell), but despite all of this I can count the number of serious arguments we have had on 1 hand, and after two years that is saying something.
It really comes down to one very simple fact. My world is brighter with Stephane in it. He brings out the best in me, and inspires me to constantly do more to better myself. He pushes me to reach my potential, and doesn’t allow me to falter or give up. He challenges me intellectually, but never forgets to show me that it’s ok to act silly sometimes. His exterior is tough but it would be hard to find someone more kind and gentle by nature. He doesn’t do for me what I should do for myself but he spoils me completely. He has taught me not to expect but to appreciate, and has helped to strengthen both my character and sense of self. If there is something too heavy for me to handle he will not simply take the burden for me (even if he wants to), but will help me to become strong enough to overcome it. He is my partner and my teammate. He is not here to make my life easy; easy is boring. He is here to make my life exciting, and every day with him is a new adventure.
Until we meet again <3,